Disclaimer: I am not a doctor, just a cartoon deer on the internet with a background in chemistry and a hyperfixation on skin. This is not medical advice.
Alright, here we go.
Here are 36 things that I would NEVER do as someone obsessed with skincare, anti-aging, and health.
Straight off the cuff:
Get bloodwork done less than once per year
Consume hyperpalatable foods more than twice in a row
Regularly consume alcohol and cigarettes
Exfoliate more than 2-3 times per week (up for debate depending on concentration)
Consistently get less than 7 hours of sleep
Get on hormonal birth control
Skip rest days (hell, I’ll take an extra one if I need it, idgaf)
Combine AHAs and retinoids at the same time
Consume whey (I don’t tolerate it well, depends on bioindividuality)
Use active ingredients without moisturizing after
Wash pillowcases less than once a week
Use AHAs during the daytime
Pop a pimple without azelaic acid on hand to kill the redness
Consistently swap out skincare products even if I know what works for me
Wash hair without using a leave-in conditioner after
Regularly wear hair in a tight ponytail (breakage + traction alopecia)
Brush teeth with anything charcoal-y (homage @BowTiedGatorDDS)
Sleep in makeup
Use those sketchy eyelash growth serums
Use anything for regrowth that isn’t minox or rosemary actually
Use skincare products with heavy fragrance (I don’t tolerate it well)
Regularly use hot tools on hair (heat breaks the disulfide bonds -> literal breakage)
Bleach hair
Dermaroll or microneedle at home (jk, actually I’d trust myself to do it, but not 90% of y’all)
Use bio-oil to fix stretch marks (it’s not gonna do anything, the formula is mid. Try my full stretch marks protocol instead)
Spend bands on snail mucin when glycerin and hyaluronic acid work as well and are cheaper
Use saturated fats as moisturizer (I don’t tolerate heavy fats well)
Dermaplane over active acne
Dermaplane more than once a week at the very most
Apply vitamin C on wet skin (unless the directions say to literally apply on wet skin)
Buy an eye cream unless it’s got peptides or epidermal growth factor
Expect a jade roller or gua sha to do anything other than have a temporary depuffing effect
Store my products with active ingredients where they get hit with UV light
Skip cardio (y’all do not take care of your hearts enough for me, smh)
Skip right to retinA without spending time with retinyl palmitate or retinol first
Expect a toothpaste to whiten teeth and not get whitening strips
Cheers,
Notes:Â
Come hang out with me on Instagram @RealSkincareStacy for more graphic content and future Q&As
You can find consultations here or DM me on Twitter to book with ETH.Â
That awkward moment when I literally bought snail mucin to try it this week lol... luckily just a cheap travel-size impulse purchase at Winners (Canadian version of TJ Maxx)